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Will Turner Vs Inigo Montoya
Relentless sword trainig, daddy issues, fly facial hair, and association with pirates? Damn. Intro (The Cliffs of Insanity, 0:00-0:50) Inigo: Fezzik, are there any rocks ahead? Fezzik: If there are, we’ll be dead! Vizzini: No more rhymes now, I mean it! Fezzik: Anybody want a peanut? Vizzini: AAAAAUUUUUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!! A small ship is sailing through the seas surrounding a large cliffside in the early morning, sneaking ahead as slowly as the soft winds can carry it. The ship is only manned by three people; a giant man at the helm, a small Sicilian sitting at a table, and a Spaniard working with some ropes on the mast. Inigo: Let Fezzik have his fun, Vizzini. It would make this boring trip much easier. Vizzini: And just why shouldn’t this trip be boring? We’re carrying very precious cargo, and once we deliver her to your stupid Spanish government, the whole world is going to go up in a war! If we do it properly, we’ll be long gone and very rich by the time that happens, but if we mess up, we’ll be hanged for treason, so everything must go according to my plans! No excitement! Inigo: Ah, that is a shame. Fezzik: For that, we have him to blame. Vizzini: Shut up! Inigo: And what happens when that ship catches up with us? Vizzini: What ship? Inigo: That one over there with the black sails. Vizzini quickly stands up and jogs over to Inigo by the rails. Sure enough, a large ship with black sails is on the horizon, heading towards their boat. Vizzini: Heh. Nobody knows we’re here, or what we have. Those people won’t bother us. It would be completely inconceivable! Now go make sure our guest has eaten her breakfast! Inigo walks towards the cargo hold, and while his back is turned, he fails to hear a muffled yelp and a splash in the water. Right before he descends down the steps to the hold of the ship, Montoya stops, thinking for a second before turning around. Inigo: Vizzini, is she our guest, or our prisoner? ???: She is my bride! (The Swordfight, 0:04-0:19) Inigo and Fezzik are suddenly staring at an Englishman on their dock where Vizzini was a few seconds ago; he has already drawn his sword to keep the others at bay. Fezzik and Inigo both slowly raise their hands in surrender as the man, William Turner, approaches the latter. Will: Take me to Elizabeth’s quarters. Inigo: Did you come from the black ship? Fezzik: Perhaps this man needs to, get a grip. Will: I did, but I no longer need the Pearl. Once I have Elizabeth, I’m hijacking this ship to help free my father. Inigo: Ah, a man loyal to his father. Tell me, do you happen to have six fingers on your right hand? Will: Is that always a question you ask people about to kill you? Inigo: I can hope. But you won’t kill me. (Up Is Down, 0:11-0:34) Inigo suddenly whips his left hand down and draws his own sword before Will can react. He slashes and forces Turner to defend, each slash pushing him further backwards until Will has to backflip over a balcony to land on the lower floor of the dock. Inigo jumps down after him as Fezzik returns to the wheel, and both men point their swords at each other, circling around the dock with skilled footwork. Inigo: Some day I hope to meet the six-fingered man and tell him “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.” You see, my friend, you are not the only one with dedication to his father. Fezzik: I hope this isn’t too bad a slaughter... Announcer: AVAST, ME HEARTIES! READY! FIGHT!!! Who are you rooting for? Turner! Montoya! Draw! 60 (Up Is Down, 0:34-1:30) Both swordsmen take two quick steps forward and cross blades at eye level; the two swords briefly struggle against each other with the sound of scraping metal as the two look fiercely into the other’s face. Inigo then backs off, and Will goes on the attack, striking at the Spaniard with several lunges and slashes; Inigo parries them all while stepping backwards. Turner keeps up the pressure, forcing Montoya further and further backwards, until just before he hits the rail on the side of the ship, where Inigo feints and flicks upwards, knocking Will’s blade out of the way; he attempts to strike, but Will manages to defend himself. Now, it is Inigo who has the offensive edge, and with many repeated lunges and slashes he tries to cut Turner down to size; the blacksmith blocks every attack, and the two are soon back at the center of the ship. 48 Will and Inigo each make a one-handed lunge at each other, and their blades meet and lock with a loud clang; they continue to hold their weapons crossed while they step in a circle around each other, not letting the rocking of the ship in the waves break their concentration or their footwork. Inigo: You are good. Will: I practiced for three hours a day! Inigo: I like you. Inigo suddenly breaks the hold and spins around, whipping his blade around to strike Will from the other direction. Turner blocks it easy enough, and then ducks under another fast slash from the Spaniard. Montoya keeps up his relentless strikes, but Will pushes them each away, before somersaulting underneath a slash and standing up behind Inigo; both turn around and swing their blades, barely passing them by the other’s face. 38 Will and Inigo step backwards from each other, and Inigo puts a hand to his cheek; withdrawing it, he is surprised to see a small amount of blood on it, stemming from a small cut he’s received on the cheek. He smiles at Will, who also bares a similar cut on his own face. The two lunge at each other again, duelling with equal skill; neither swordsman gives their ground until Inigo suddenly draws in close, and pushes his blade upwards as fast as he can; the force causes Turner to let go of his sword, which flies upwards into the air. Montoya fails to capitalize on his advantage, however, as Will ducks under both of his ensuing slashes and kicks the Spaniard in the chest, knocking him to the floor as he rolls across the deck. Will then catches his sword as it falls from the air, and walks towards his opponent. 26 As Montoya gets up and fends Will off of him, the seas are getting angrier and the skies darker, as Fezzik tries hard to steer the ship clear of the rocky cliffs. The Black Pearl, having caught up to the small vessel by a considerable amount, suddenly opens fire with a warning shot; the cannonball flies through the air and hits the water just to the side of the ship, sending up a large wave of water that rises above the two as they continue their fight in the rain. As it comes splashing down, both lock their swords overhead and grip each other’s wrists with their free hands, struggling evenly to overpower the other. 19 The wave knocks over a lantern on the ship, which falls onto a rail and breaks open, covering Turner’s sword in a bright flame. Will wins the contest and pushes Inigo off of him; Montoya spins his body to avoid Turner’s next strike, which slices through the wooden rail of the ship. He then holds up his sword to defend himself, and Will goes on the attack with his flaming sword, with lunges and slashes up, down, left, and right, as he slowly forces Inigo to the middle of the ship. Now with a fire fiercely burning in him, Turner is much more of a challenge, and it is all Inigo can do to prevent himself from being cut to ribbons; his confident look is lost as Turner soon sticks his ankle behind Montoya’s foot to trip him, and brings his sword down at the Spaniard’s neck; Montoya barely blocks the blow in time, but Will pushes the two swords closer and closer to Inigo’s face. 10 Inigo: There’s... something I must tell you... Will: What is that? Inigo: ... I am not left-handed! Montoya grips his sword in his right hand and, with a new display of strength, pushes Will off of him, taking the Englishman’s staggering as time to jump back to his feet with a renewed grin. 4 (Up Is Down, 1:52-1:56) Will attacks, but each of his slashes is effortlessly pushed out of the way by the Spaniard, who taunts him with each parry. Inigo: UNO! Inigo blocks one of Will’s overhead strikes and pushes him back. Inigo: DOS! Will tries to lunge, but his attack is sidestepped and pushed out of the way. Inigo: TRES! Both bring their swords together, but with a flick of his wrist, Montoya twists Turner’s blade around so he can stab right through the hilt. And with a swing of his arm, he sends the sword flying out of Will’s hand, where it stabs into the deck a dozen feet away and loses its flame. Inigo Montoya then brings up his sword to Will Turner’s throat, ending the fight. 'DISARMED!!!' (Drink Up Me Hearties, 0:00-0:33) Will, with a blade at his neck and no weapon in his hand, silently and reluctantly admits he’s lost the battle, and raises his hands up in surrender. Inigo: You fought well, for an Englishman. I’d give you an invitation to join us, but it looks like your friends are still looking for y... The Spaniard is interrupted when the ship takes a cannonball to the rail, which splinters apart. A rather large piece knocks Will on the back of the head, and he collapses to the deck unconscious. Inigo: ... Oh dear. Fezzik, my friend! Get us out of here! Montoya turns around, only to see Fezzik’s unconscious body draped across the helm, also having been knocked out cold. Inigo: What? Who did... CLONK! (Silence) Inigo collapses to the ground, knocked out cold by Elizabeth Swan, who stands behind him with a crowbar in her hands. She tosses her pair of now-broken handcuffs down at his body, and turns around to pick up Will. Elizabeth: Ugh, men! Scooping up her husband and shuffling to the side of the boat, Elizabeth drops Will into a small dinghy, and pulls herself into it before dropping them both into the water. Outro (In The Heat of Battle, 0:23) Announcer: THIS MELEE'S WINNER IS... INIGO MONTOYA! Category:MP999 Category:Sword Duel Category:Off Season Bonus Battles Category:'Hero Vs. Hero' themed ONE MINUTE MELEEs Category:Anti-Hero vs Anti-Hero One Minute Melees Category:'Movie vs Movie' themed One Minute Melee Category:Completed What-If? One Minute Melees Category:2017